Open gay relationship
I’ve held this personal bias (irrational judgment?) against non-monogamous relationships for years.
I’ve had two open relationships in the past and both ended badly. But I also happen to have several really good friends who are either in or have explored relationships beyond monogamy, which are generally more common in the queer group. So, I often find myself bumping up against my subconscious judgments of people who I respect and adoration simply for having a relationship arrangement that didn’t serve out for me.
Recently, I decided it was finally hour I confront my bias head-on and hear some friends out on their experiences with non-monogamy: the good, the bad, and the beautiful.
SEE ALSO: 7 people on what it’s really love to be polyamorous
First, I was curious why it seemed so many queers just couldn’t sound to keep it in their pants, even after deciding to commit. Create no mistake, monogamous relationships are still the standard, regardless of how you identify. However, a recent study suggests 30% of lgbtq+ men are actively in non-monogamous relationships. Some might even arg
Gay Men in Open Relationships: What Works?
Hint: It will take a lot of work.
As a couples counselor working with gay men I am often asked my opinion on monogamy and open LGBTQ relationships. What works for men in long-term relationships? First, the research.
Several research studies show that about 50% of gay male couples are monogamous and about 50% allow for sex outside of the bond. The research finds no difference in the level of happiness or stability among these groups.
Next, my opinions and advice, based on my therapy practice.
Talk About It Openly With Your Partner
If you and your partner want to have a close partnership and have additional sex partners, be prepared for a lot of talking. And I&#;m not just referring to discussions about when, where and with whom. I mean talking about feelings, what we therapists call &#;processing.&#;
If that kind of conversation makes you squirm, I realize. Most men are not socialized to embrace the sharing of intimate and vulnerable emotions. However, if you aren&#;t willing to experiment with processing then I suspect
How to Have an Open Queer Relationship That Doesn&#;t Hurt
I ponder gay men might be the most sexually creative people in the world. I don’t contain any research data to help this, but have you heard of San Francisco’s Folsom Highway Fair? It’s the world largest celebration of sexuality, and it was created by gay men.
At the Gay Therapy Center, part of our agenda is to help couples support all that creativity with beautiful, intimate exchange. Without that support, sexuality can definitely hurt.
Many gay couples who want open relationships, (and that’s about half of gay couples), have learned to create accessible relationships while maintaining emotional guard and sexual intimacy with their long term partners. Are you looking for some inspiration for what that could look like?
Here are some examples from the stories of my clients. All of their names have been changed to protect their privacy.
Craig and Jeffrey
Craig wants multiple partners but Jeffrey only wants Craig. After much discussion and experimenting they have created a scheme that works for both of them. They cuddle on th
Considering Open Relationships P1. | Thoughts for Gay Couples to Consider
Open relationships are the new sandbox where many LGBTQIA+ persons evaluate out their relational skills. Can we explore modern relationships and not violate one another’s boundaries? Will our health,our sex and our emotional intimacy thrive because of open relationships, or will they turn into tattered by pain and rejection over time?
Many of us wonder if we can trust our lovers to the powers and pulls of an unseal relationship, while others crave for another outlet for their love and experiences that keep a perception of youthful joy alive. No matter the context from which you examine the idea of opening your relationship, I suggest you take time to read through this 3-part series.
What is an Reveal Relationship?
An open relationship is a committed partnership in which both individuals permission to engaging in affectionate or sexual relationships with people outside of the primary couple. Exploring Reveal Relationships vs. Monogamy! Curious about polyamory? Check out our detailed guide.
The key factors that differentiate ethi